I fall Short


Yesterday, I was reading about Love. Love according to the bible. Love in the bible has a totally different turn around than what we humans think of.

It was listing all the things that Love is not.

“It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.” 1 Corinthians 13:4-6

I envy to be a manager. I boast and am proud of how hard I work and how happy I make people at my job. In some ways, I’m self-seeking when comes to moving to New Jersey. I’m seeking what I myself want and when. But in other ways, I’m following God and his will.

Then I could go and say what Love is.

“Love is patient, love is kind…..It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” 1 Corinthians 13:4-6

I’m kind, and I’m learning to be patient in the mist of everything God has me going throw right now. I don’t always protect, trust, hope, persevere. I do most the times, but then something happens and then I just give up and I tell God, “I can’t. Please help me.”.

Well, that’s good, right? I got Envy, Pride, I’m Boastful, I’m also Proud. But its okay, because I’m kind.

If I’m kind for selfish reason’s then what do I gain?

“If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.” 2 Corinthians 13:1-3

When I look at my life, I see another sinner. Another screw up in need of a savior. Good thing I have Jesus. I’ve been in the faith for 3 years. I’m still growing. God is Patient.

I email a Pastor the other day, and asked him if he felt the same way I felt. I was feeling like, “who am I? That God calls me to be a Pastor. Calls me in to ministry? I’m just a sinful human.”. The Pastor reply that he does feel that same way at times. It uplifted me. Reminded me, God isn’t looking for holy people for his kingdom, he came as a doctor, for the sick. But the Doctor does his job and turns unhealthy to healthy. Sin to Holy.

This is an everyday battle. Pull your bible out. That can be your Sword against evil. When you read it and do as it says. I know what I’m going to be working on in my life. Getting that envy, pride and all that stuff out of me, while putting on Kindness that is not self seeking. Patience, and last learning to protects, trusts, hopes, perseveres and not just for a moment but always.

(Remember, don’t look at my life and judge it. Look at your own life and see where you need to be fix-en at. I just wanted to give an example.)

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